To Serve Man (not a cookbook)(well, maybe)
I was talking a while ago with Izzy, a very thoughtful person whose words I often ponder. (He is an excellent fellow with whom to share a fire on an eerily-lit snowy night.)
Izzy was talking about how we are here in this life to do as well as we can for ourselves, but also that there is need for balancing this by being of service to others. The gist of his premise is that if you are not of service, you are not complete as a person.
I've been giving this a lot of thought. I'm a helpful kind of guy; I hold doors, help with parcels, let people merge in traffic. I like things to go smoothly and I also think that if you can turn a frown upside down you are doing your little bit to battle human entropy. I think we are indeed here to be of help to one another, and sometimes all it takes to be helpful is a genuine inquiry after someone's health or a listening ear. But I had never thought of it in terms of service before.
It is especially of interest to me since I have realized that, while I enjoy being helpful, I get bent out of shape if I perceive that someone is perceiving me as servile. Arguing definitions here, perhaps -- but in my lexicon there is a great chasm between the words helpful and servile. I help people because I feel it is right to do so, not because I think I am their inferior or from a need to be a doormat.
And even when one is of service, it takes some careful consideration to assure that one's efforts are worthwhile and not actually harmful. For just as there is a chasm between the words mentioned above, there can be a chasm between what someone wants and what they actually need. Because want is often expressed by someone's ego, and while it is a kindness to bolster a sagging ego it is an error to feed a demanding ego -- if you give it suck it will attach with lamprey teeth and you will be nursing a monster. To feed a demanding ego is to actually give support to the closest enemy of the person you think you are helping.
I shall continue to ponder this (and ponder the role of my own ego in considerations of the matter). In the meantime I shall continue with my small helpfulnesses, for their own glory and not mine own. But there is one area where I can increase my efforts, and I thank Izzy for getting me thinking about this more than usual.
I don't have to look far to see how I can be of service, and it is in a form difficult of misapplication. I do massage, I do body manipulation, I do energy healing, and all rather well. In short, I can make people's bodies feel better. A service I can offer freely and without debate about consequence, as it feeds the body and the spirit and is also a balanced diet for the ego. I can do these things; I see I do not do them often enough. But I can offer them more, and I can dedicate a greater part of my time and self to becoming more insightful and skillful when I do get the chance to apply these skills.
So in the time to come watch for me to better Serve Man (and Woman) in this way, my own recipe for a happier world. With a dash of Izzy.
Izzy was talking about how we are here in this life to do as well as we can for ourselves, but also that there is need for balancing this by being of service to others. The gist of his premise is that if you are not of service, you are not complete as a person.
I've been giving this a lot of thought. I'm a helpful kind of guy; I hold doors, help with parcels, let people merge in traffic. I like things to go smoothly and I also think that if you can turn a frown upside down you are doing your little bit to battle human entropy. I think we are indeed here to be of help to one another, and sometimes all it takes to be helpful is a genuine inquiry after someone's health or a listening ear. But I had never thought of it in terms of service before.
It is especially of interest to me since I have realized that, while I enjoy being helpful, I get bent out of shape if I perceive that someone is perceiving me as servile. Arguing definitions here, perhaps -- but in my lexicon there is a great chasm between the words helpful and servile. I help people because I feel it is right to do so, not because I think I am their inferior or from a need to be a doormat.
And even when one is of service, it takes some careful consideration to assure that one's efforts are worthwhile and not actually harmful. For just as there is a chasm between the words mentioned above, there can be a chasm between what someone wants and what they actually need. Because want is often expressed by someone's ego, and while it is a kindness to bolster a sagging ego it is an error to feed a demanding ego -- if you give it suck it will attach with lamprey teeth and you will be nursing a monster. To feed a demanding ego is to actually give support to the closest enemy of the person you think you are helping.
I shall continue to ponder this (and ponder the role of my own ego in considerations of the matter). In the meantime I shall continue with my small helpfulnesses, for their own glory and not mine own. But there is one area where I can increase my efforts, and I thank Izzy for getting me thinking about this more than usual.
I don't have to look far to see how I can be of service, and it is in a form difficult of misapplication. I do massage, I do body manipulation, I do energy healing, and all rather well. In short, I can make people's bodies feel better. A service I can offer freely and without debate about consequence, as it feeds the body and the spirit and is also a balanced diet for the ego. I can do these things; I see I do not do them often enough. But I can offer them more, and I can dedicate a greater part of my time and self to becoming more insightful and skillful when I do get the chance to apply these skills.
So in the time to come watch for me to better Serve Man (and Woman) in this way, my own recipe for a happier world. With a dash of Izzy.
posted by InsightStraight @ 8:26 PM
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